Suicidal, but not depressed. Where do I go from here?

You are only 17 and you are not even aware of your options, so don't make a permanent choice for a temporary, solvable problem. From your post, you seem to have above average ability with your spelling, grammer, and language (seriously, have you seen some of the posts on here?) Contact your state work commission. They can help you. Job Corps operates a GED & job training program that helps young people get a GED, which is a high school equivalency certificate & their job training program will provide training in skills to help you get and keep a job. Don't let your past get you down or get in the way of your future. You need to believe that you are worthy of a good future and then work to make it happen. Try this exercise twice a day: while looking in a mirror, say 10 positive things to yourself, aloud. You need to build your self esteem, & this exercise is a good way to start. Get up every day and get showered & dressed, don't just lay around the house. Go tomorrow to your state's workforce commission and get signed up for all the help they can give you. Then follow through. You can change your life, you just have to be willing to work at it. I wish you the very best of everything.